A Wandering Mind

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Decision-Making: The One Skill You Need to Take Control of Your Life


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In the ever-changing battlefield of life, there is one weapon more potent than any other, one skill that stands paramount – the power of decision-making. This tool, when honed and wielded with precision, can significantly impact the course of our lives. This realization dawned on me not in the realms of corporate boardrooms or academic institutions but in the disciplined, rigorous environment of military training.

As a former Medic, I was taught that decisiveness could mean the difference between life and death. Our Drill Sergeants and Whiskey Instructors, as they were fondly called, often barked the mantra, "Make a decision! Any decision is better than no decision!" While the connection between swift decision-making and survival in combat was clear, it wasn't until I transitioned into civilian life that the profound wisdom of those words truly sank in.

While the threats and challenges we face in our daily lives may not be as immediate or life-threatening as those on the battlefield, the principle remains the same. When we hesitate, overthink, or freeze in indecision, we cede control. We become spectators in our own lives, as circumstances or other people make decisions for us. We lose our agency, and a life without agency is unfulfilling and devoid of meaning.

The Oxford Dictionary defines 'agency' as action or intervention to produce a particular effect. To live a life of purpose and fulfillment, we must seize our agency, make decisions, and take deliberate actions to attain our life goals.

However, in our discourse on decision-making, we often focus exclusively on making the 'right' decision, overlooking the importance of the act of decision-making itself. The adage "time is money" holds a kernel of truth here. Deliberating endlessly can become counterproductive, leading to stagnation and missed opportunities. After all, it's not our thoughts but our actions that ultimately bring about the desired results.

So, how can we sharpen our decision-making skills and reclaim our agency? Here are seven strategies to consider:



1. Build Self-Confidence: Confidence is the bedrock of decision-making. Trusting your judgment, even in uncertain situations, is crucial. This confidence often comes from experience, including both triumphs and failures, as they provide valuable insights and strengthen our resilience.

2. Gather Information: While some situations call for quick decisions, others require careful analysis. Decisiveness sometimes means pausing to collect all relevant information before making an informed decision. It's about striking a balance between acting impulsively and taking the time to reflect.

3. Assess Risks: Good decision-makers can evaluate potential risks and rewards. Recognizing that every decision carries a certain level of risk can alleviate fears of making the wrong choice, and instead promote a proactive, calculated approach.

4. Embrace Mistakes: Mistakes are an integral part of the learning process. Accepting that not every decision will yield a successful outcome, but each one, even those that result in failure, offers a learning opportunity.

5. Set Clear Goals: Having a clear vision of what you want to achieve can streamline the decision-making process. With well-defined goals, it becomes easier to make decisions that align with your desired outcomes.

6. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness can enhance cognitive focus, manage stress, and aid in decision-making. By encouraging presence in the current moment, mindfulness enables us to make decisions based on current circumstances, free from the constraints of past mistakes or future uncertainties.

7. Practice Decision-Making: Just like any other skill, decision-making improves with practice. Start with small decisions and gradually work your way up to more significant ones as your confidence grows.

One of the biggest roadblocks to decisiveness is the quest for perfection. We often get caught in the trap of overthinking, seeking the elusive 'perfect' decision. But perfection is an illusion. It's fleeting and unattainable. Instead, strive for constant improvement. Implement a 'good enough' solution and refine it over time. Remember, it's through action, not endless deliberation, that we identify flaws and make necessary improvements.


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Taking the reins of our lives requires a shift in perspective. It's about acknowledging that the power to carve our destiny resides within us. We can make this shift by refining our decision-making skills, a process that allows us to regain our agency and transition from passive bystanders to active architects of our life journey. The crux of the matter isn't about always making the 'perfect' decision, but rather making a decision and dedicating ourselves to making it work. This, in essence, is the key to steering your life, living with intention, and actualizing your aspirations.

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